Listen, Portland. It's not you. It's me.
I hate to say it, but our time together has probably ended. It's been a great run, really, but I have to get back to my life now. The Mothership (California) calls.
Whether you are from the Mothership, an Eagles fan or both, you know the deal: You can check out, move to Portland, DC, New York, Boston, Dayton, or Pittsburgh (as I have), but sooner or later, the Mothership will call your wayward ass back to California. To quote the Eagles, "You can never leave."
The Mothership has some pretty manipulative tricks to get a gal back here, too. Here are my favorites:
That would be my niece Sadie right there, in her "I heart my auntie" tank top, sans pants (can you tell we're related?), proudly displaying Rico's favorite toy, "Handicap-able Tigger," which he showed his love for by only pulling off one arm. Generally, he leaves nothing but a plush carcass surrounded by disemboweled piles of fluff. Handicap-able Tigger has been maimed, but meticulously preserved. For Rico, that's love. Yes.
There's my sister Annie and nephew Cooper, Sadie's mom and brother. When I'm old and gray and needing someone to mash my bananas and turn up Lawrence Welk because I can't find the clicker, let this kid not find the blog post in which I out him as an underwear head. Do you think you know cuter kids?
You don't. Here's more of their cuteness.
Add these tempting Mothership treats: My Marin, San Francisco, Berkeley, Monterey, and Santa Cruz pals, the handsome David, sailing skills just itching for a day on the bay (Monterey or San Francisco, thanks), actual opportunities for professional advancement, plus a renewed sense of state pride hewn from eight months of tirelessly defending California to the state of Oregon, and ... how can I not come home?
Plus, as I said, the Mothership plays dirty when it comes to calling her pirate dogs back home. How can I fight against this kind of cuteness?
Or this ... Look at her!!!
Rico is absolutely gonna rip Sadie's puppy's fluffy guts out.
Viva California!
